It is better to trust in the Lord than to put confidence in man. Psalms 118:8
For years, I was apart of a "religious" organization and under the subjection of it's control system. Every time I had a real encounter with God, there was resistance. The noise of man's agenda for control, traditions, and hierarchy overshadowed the guidance of the Holy Spirit and even the word of God in my life.
Since I was a child, I would hear God's voice in my ear, have dreams and visions about certain things concerning my life that would literally come to pass shortly after. I thought something was wrong with me because the prophetic was never talked about in this particular church and I didn't know much of anything about it.
It got to the point where I would pray and pray out of confusion and hurt that the way God was dealing with me didn't coincide with the limitations this church was putting on God.
Eventually at the age of 26, God gave me the instruction to leave. When this happened, there were no questions about it and there was no looking back.
I can't say that I got on the right path immediately after I left because I still had the mentality of of the "religious spirit" having grown up in this particular church. It was all I knew.
I had the mentality that I had to somehow go through the church or leaders to know God and to be led by God. What I didn't realize is that I needed to understand personal relationship with God in it's fullness and not in the way the church had perverted it.
Before God delivered me from this mentality, it took a major toll on the course of my life. The intimidation and fear of man through this religious mentality resulted in me being hesitant to be led by the spirit of God for myself. Because of this, I ended up marrying the wrong man who claimed to be a pastor and even prophesied to me that I was his wife.
Although "love" or attraction wasn't at all a factor for why I married, all I knew was submission and obedience to religious leaders and their guidance.
God allowed me to go through with marrying this man who I later found to be severely hypocritical, had doctrinal errors, and was absolutely not the man of God he had led me to believe.
Through this, I have learned to develop right relationship with God by following his voice and his guidance on my own as it aligns with the word of God. Even if I was not prophetic, God speaks through my devotion and my prayer life. Ultimately, I have learned that personal relationship starts with me and that every church/leader God allows me to connect with should only be an asset to it.
I am now allowing him to lead me to the right church, the right places, and the right people because at the end of the day, NOBODY can assure me of what God is saying for my life but me, and that only comes from knowing him.
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